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User blog:Tkid115/James Bond vs Ezio Auditore - 115 Rap Battles Season 2
Welcome to the penultimate episode of 115 Rap Battles! One more till the finale!!!!!!! This one features returning rapper and master Assassin of Italy Ezio Auditore da Firenze versus famed British movie spy/action hero James Bond to see which lady-killing, bad guy-killing master of stealth is better! ...oh yeah, in my other, shitty Assassin battle I forgot to include this guy so screw it! 'Cast:' EpicLLOYD as James Bond (Connery) George Watsky as James Bond (Craig) Nice Peter as Ezio Auditore/Arno Dorian Xin Wuku as Altair (cameo) / Ezio stunt-double 'Beat:' Bond starts at 0:11 ' 'Battle: ''115 RAP BATTLES!!!!! BOND!!!! JAMES BOND!!!!! VS.... EZIO! AUDITORE! DA FIRENZE!!!!!!! BEGIN!!!! '''Bond (Connery):' Bond. James. Pray tell you remember it. In this fight, treat your life like your family's and treasure it. You're primative. Old school. Shitty version of your predicessor! I'm the most famous cinematic masterpieces! So no pressure! Every character like your's is just a wannabe me! The only difference is an outlaw is the best that you will ever be! With all the people close to you who have died, how can anybody trust you? I'm proper (unlike you). So I'll give the gentleman's'' FUCK YOU!' Ezio: Ok, time to overcome these weak words. It's-a-the bone breaking boss! The moment you showed up, Bond, is the same moment that you lost! You rhyme so generic, like the enemies you've slayed! I flow as smooth as my game-play as rap as sharp as my hidden blade! This British Doctor Who Jones just cannot step to Da Firenze! You're a so-called "pimp", while I'm the master Assassin's sensei! Can you-a-beat an Auditore? Dr. No you can't! Witness this eagle take flight, and crush this puny British ant! Bond (Craig): Crush me? Please! Challenging me's a real leap of faith! You act like you're an important part of history, but we all know you're a fake! (No shit!) I have actual fucking class! You're dressed up in a priest's robes! I'll go REALISTIC on your ass! Like your stunts, you should have broken bones! Let this be a revelation that you'll never do better, than M's badass lady-killer who's got the looks and is more clever, than an Italian greaser who lost his family! (Got hanged!) And went on a pointless mission, while his little Caterina got banged! Ezio: Eagle Vison is telling me there is no threat in sight, so this peasent must be INSANE if he thinks he puts up a good fight! I've battled the Templars, my own friends, and I've grown tired of winning! I'll let a revolutionary take over and create a new beginning! Arno: Mon Dieu! ''What is with this little "spy" making so much racket! I'll eat him like a baguette and piss all over his Armani jacket! Saying that no one can step up to you is truly quite new to me! You must have a disease with all the "Bond girls" that you've been in close ''Unity! You're style's getting old! Replacement after replacement! Phantom shoot your golden eyes so you don't know who you're facin'! You're winding down, Bond! Our popularity's boostin'! We'll beat you so hard, you'll end up bloodier than the Revolution! We pull off crazy stunts, but they're more real than YOUR'S, at least! Driving across an artic sea? I'd rather have to kill Elise , than watch all your dumbass movies!I guess that's why we're in this brawl! Swing our hidden blades to your balls, then watch your sky fall! ''WHO WON?!!!! YOU DECIDE!!!! 115 (Pew pew pew!) RAP! (Snikt!) BATTLES!!!!!!!!'' WHO WON?!!! James Bond Ezio Auditore/Arno Dorian Category:Blog posts